04-21-04

Two apple martinis and a drunk mgr.

Walking across town last night i found myself to be almost trampled by a large crowd of theatre people, it was the scariest thing to happen yet. But assuming the places intown would be open a little later i decided to grab a drink. So I finally stopped by Bossa Nova’s for that martini i have been meaning to get. The atmosphere was wonderful. I was a bit perterbed that i couldn’t just have a drink with out being oogled by every guy in there, i was going in to detox for f-sake. I mean, there is a time and place a girl likes to get oogled, mine have long since flown the wayside since i get paid to be oogled at la strada.

Sitting at the bar a nice older gentlemen came up and we started discussing apple martinis. Apparently since i didn’t call the vodka i was drinking schmirnoff which was no good in his books considering he was a representative from absolut vodka. So he bought me another drink, or his friend who he introduced me too later did, either way someone (i am hoping) paid for my two martinis, one with schmirnoff (bad me) and one with absolut (yay.), who may i add have a pretty yummy website. meh, in the end they turned out to be right and i ended up apologizing for my novice mistake.

So about the vendor’s friend…a restaurant manager from a place i love to go (think chardonnay and pasta primevera) who was completely smashed and kept trying to kiss me. Thank goodness they bought me a second martini becuase it made the situation less painful. Optimistically speaking however it is refreshing to be able to be able to use new psuedonyms instead of “artist boy” and “artist boy with piercings or glasses or purple hair” or “artist boy who is way younger and way less mature than he needs to be to get in my pants.” I am about ready to just give them numbers because even i was mixing them up a bit. Anyway drunken mgr. guy had just gotten back from Movin Out (Billy Joel’s Musical that is in town, opening night) and was incredibly drunk, like eye rolling drunk. I answered the same questions three times including something about marriage… which was way too soon in the conversation to be talking about such nonsense. i have my pugs and my apple martinis to keep me content for a while, minus my every so once in a while slip up. But that made me think, if thats what pick up lines consist of now days what are women becoming and/or what do guys think we are. Plus he refered that i might be lying on three seperate occasions, two of which involved the vodka debate. I pointed out it was pointless to loss my morality over something as stupid as vodka and i wasn’t lying.

GAAAWWWD, then the vendor kept coming over telling us we made a great couple, i wanted to puke. By the third time he stopped by and used the acronym CCC (cute couple on campus) i was calling my exit. Don’t get me wrong, i knew he meant well but i refuse to be used as a marketing piece for absolut. Then drunken mgr’s cute intellegtual-verging-on-gay friend said something about making sure i didn’t go home with him, which i assured him i wouldn’t. Now i am easy and a liar? I am not going to take it personally, i am sure it is just what their past experiences with females have taught them. Which leads to another thing…ladies, come on, some of you out there had to act this way for these men to think this…Pavlovian effect. The red light goes on the dog thinks it will get shocked and jumps. In this case the dog sees pussy, the dog assumes it will get shocked, or laid and lied too. Neurosis and sex, meh that sounds about right.