04-14-04

addictive like crack…only more fun

So perhaps i have a living situation i can actually afford, i find out more tonight. I was walking around downtown today after work on my way to buy a new umbrella…the two greatest casualties of living in the city, umbrellas and stockings, i go through both as if they were water. I realized, if this apartment thing comes through i will have nothing left to work towards, i won’t need another job, i will be able to afford everything the way it is, schools settled for the moment, thats it, nothing. I will be completely stable. So the next thought that popped into my head is “this is why ppl have relationships, for something to do when there is nothing left to work towards in the immediacy of the present.” then i thought that was a very tragic waste of time and began to get depressed if all i had to look forward to was the next time i had drinks with a so-and-so of the week. In case you haven’t noticed, so-an-so’s have lost their appeal to me and i haven’t really wanted to do to much drinking with them.

Then it hit me, i needed a new addiction, and i found it…shoes! yay shoes! In the last two days i have bought three new pairs of shoes and yum, shoes are great, better than sex. So my new addiction is shoes, because i am not planning on moving for a couple of years anywhere new I am now in a position to be able to accumulate things like shoes and clothes… yay clothes! So my new addiction is fashion, my own style of course, which i suppose reeks of sex (you should see the heels on the brown pair i bought today, and the white ones yesterday). So in the end i get my sex and eat it too…the shear exercise of masochism wearing some of these babies would even bring in a bit of BDSM into my life once again. yay BDSM!

04-14-04

Now i realized why i had an itch to call him…

Now i realized why i had an itch to call him…he was thinking about me, i came home to an IM from him. Sunday i figured if i had to call him i would wait until wednesday, then call when i knew he would be at work. Then when he called back i would be busy (undoubtedly for when am i not busy?) and so on and so forth until one of us went mad. and since i am already there and i would wager large amounts of money that he is already mad as well, we would have an eternal game of phone tag until the end of time. muahaha! eternal phone tag.